Here are tips that can help you start the self-healing process and move on after ending a relationship.

Accept the reality

If you’re trying to be optimistic in a troubled relationship, it’s not necessarily a bad thing, and can even energize through these undesirable situations. However, if the relationship is no longer salvageable, you need to look directly at reality instead of trying to think in a positive way, such as remembering promises and futures that both of you once dreamed of. . 

You need to understand that love cannot be cultivated from one side, the person you love may not feel the same regrets as you. Maybe they no longer love you, or because the two of you have too many conflicts, arguments take up every moment together. Therefore, you need to have the courage to admit what is happening so that you can make positive and appropriate choices for yourself. 

Determine what you want in a relationship

Carefully determining what you want and what you don’t like in a relationship will help you understand if your current partner is really the right person for you.

Let’s say you are a person who values ​​communication in a relationship, and that person is someone who rarely shows affection and often disconnects from you. As such, this issue will linger in your heart for a long time until arguments break out. When you realize that the person you love is not meeting what you want, you will be more easily influenced by emotions and easily lead to negative thoughts. 

Learn to accept the value that love brings to you

Throughout adulthood, each person will experience a number of special relationships that form new personalities and learn many invaluable lessons, whether the relationship lasts or not.

Thus, the fact that a romantic relationship has ended does not mean that you have missed and lost many things. Letting go of a love is also an opportunity for you to reflect on all the good things you went through, as well as learn a lot from the experience in this relationship. 

Accepting the sincere feelings that love has brought will help you feel peaceful and confident moving forward. Moreover, acknowledging the importance of love will help you realize that the current cooled relationship is not for you at all.

Towards the future

Old feelings or good memories are often what holds you back, making it difficult to move on when you’ve just ended a relationship. However, if you let yourself stay stuck in your old relationship, you may find it difficult to be happy with anyone else in the future. 

The secret to getting out of this situation is to think more about your future. Even if you are not ready for a new relationship, you should realize that there are many wonderful people out there who can help you feel more positive and happy, instead of the one who hurt you. you in the past. 

You should not worry when you have not found the right other half. You may still need time to recover and enjoy your single life in a healthy way. We tend to be attracted to people with the same vibrational frequency, so be the best version you can to easily find the “destiny” of your life, friends!

Prioritize developing other relationships

In the process of recovering from a breakup, many people often go through the pain alone and “forget” other important relationships in their lives. There are many reasons for this, for example, you are afraid that they will be bothered, or because you were previously absorbed in pursuing a love relationship and neglecting other relationships… 

However, friends and family are very important groups of people so that you can quickly get over the pain of your ex. What you need to do now is find reliable people to be able to get help and useful advice from them. 

At the same time, if you feel that someone is judging or judging your choices, or making you feel worse, wisely refuse to receive these messages and limit your time with them. . 

Take time for yourself

When you’re completely in love, you often experience small, even dramatic, changes in your appearance or personality to fit the relationship. 

Therefore, after ending the romantic relationship, assess for yourself what the negative changes are and improve it. The reason so many people become more beautiful and positive after a breakup is that they have learned to take care of themselves more, by changing the way they dress, losing weight, investing in personal interests, etc. Self-care is never a waste. Turning pain into motivation to be better is what you need to do after a breakup.

Give yourself space

This may sound obvious at first, but it is a very important step in the recovery process. However, many people ask the question: should they be friends with their ex ? 

The answer depends on the situation and the choice of each person. However, while you are still feeling hurt by what happened, you should give yourself some space and avoid contact with them so as not to be provoked by negative emotions. 

Continuing to be friends with your partner is not a bad idea if the relationship is healthy, but consider waiting until you realize you no longer have feelings for them, otherwise, You may end up causing yourself unnecessary heartbreak.

Accept that you need time to recover

We can’t stop loving someone all of a sudden for an hour, a day, or a week. Letting go of feeling loved and loved by someone we once held so dear is very difficult and takes a lot of time. So you don’t have to push yourself to do things you know you can’t. Here are some tips to help you get through this difficult time:

• Be patient with yourself.
• Practice compassion by telling yourself things you can share with a friend in the same situation.
• Accept that getting hurt is inevitable in life.
• Remind yourself that the pain won’t last forever.

Loving someone who isn’t right for you doesn’t make you stupid or flawed, on the contrary, you’re great to see the strengths of that person and once had faith they would change for you. But this belief shouldn’t last too long when nothing changes, you can’t force someone who doesn’t belong to you to change their nature. Therefore, you need to leave when you realize that, before you get too much hurt from this relationship.

Talk to a therapist

If the above methods fail to calm or soothe your emotions, or you feel that you are suffering from psychological problems that cannot heal on their own, such as suicidal thoughts, falling into a state of despair, persistent anxiety… The most important thing you need to do right now is find a therapist that is right for you.

Therapy provides a safe, non-judgmental space where you can freely express your feelings and seek effective therapies to address your concerns. A therapist can also teach you skills to manage these feelings until their frequency decreases.