Many times we forget that, when developing in a healthy way in relation to our emotional side, it is not enough to know how to control ourselves or identify which emotions dominate in each moment. Also It is very important to know how to express emotions.

In this article we will see some keys to convey to others the reality of how we feel, especially with regard to those mental states whose nature goes beyond words.

How to express our feelings in every personal relationships?

Much of what holds us together is our ability to connect emotionally with others. It is difficult to maintain a relationship, be it family, relationship or friendship, with a person who knows nothing about how he feels, in the range of colors he usually sees reality and how he does it.

However, knowing how to express emotions is a challenge. First, you have to deal with a series of cultural barriers that have led to disregard for certain emotional expressions, and that are especially appreciated with men and with those whose sexual orientation is not prescriptive, but ultimately affects the whole world. For centuries, letting emotions stain the most important aspects of our way of life was seen as a sign of weakness, or something inappropriate and censored.

But another component that hinders our way of expressing emotions is something that goes beyond our cultural context: emotions themselves are something that doesn’t fit into our usual way of expressing ourselves through language.

Just to help you progress in your mission to connect more and better with others, here are a series of tips on how to express emotions both through words and through the use of other communication resources, independently if we apply them to our partner in the context of love, or with friends and family.

1. Always adapt to the way you express yourself

First of all, it is essential to get rid of the idea that we can always express our feelings in the same way, as if we have a way of expressing them so privately that we cannot adapt to it. This is not so: if the person in front of us cannot understand what we mean, we will not show anything.

So if you really want to show a part of you that you consider relatively intimate and that has something to do with how you feel, you should think about the prospect that the other person leaves. For example, how would you explain a physical approach on our part? Is it possible that he understands a concept that we would use to create a metaphor? Did you know we were confident enough with her in the first place to express it to you, or would you believe it was just a joke??

Knowing how to ask the right questions to adapt to our communication style is an art, and for this it often takes practice and honest intentions to express ourselves, and not simply to give a certain image because it meets our preferences.

2. Learn assertiveness

Expressing that emotion is also an act of courage. Therefore, you must avoid shame into an excuse, and this is achieved among other things by working on your assertiveness, your ability to affirm your own feelings and your own values.

3. Make your social circle healthy

To make it easier to start when expressing emotions, it’s important not to surround yourself with people who react negatively when we do it. So it’s good to find people who are open and receptive that they don’t see in affection as a reason to criticize or ridicule.

4. Take advantage of nonverbal languages

When expressing emotions, nonverbal language is essential. Be careful not to ignore it and not take it into account or even suppress it, since too neutral an expression when communicating emotions can completely revolve around what we want to say. In particular, it is especially important that you pay attention to the entire voice that you use and its music, as well as how you manage your distance from others, and what you do with your arms and look: the latter must be directed at the eyes of others.

5. Write what you feel

This is a very good way to know in advance what you feel, something necessary to be able to express it. In addition, it can serve you to practice ways of communicating in language, although, as we have seen, these will not be perfect or sufficient to express what we feel.

6. Find the right place

Context is almost as important as what is said. Just as using one or another nonverbal language style can make the same word mean different things, the context in which we find ourselves when we say it also has this effect. Therefore, make sure that there is a coherence between the content of what you are going to communicate and where you carry it out, so that there are no misunderstandings that need to be clarified.